The Secret Life of a Curvy Girl

“You're getting obese,” remarked a loved one, staring at my thighs. 

They spread across my chair, wide and troublesome. I was twelve. At twelve years old I realized I was fat. Fat was bad. And what do you do with bad? You punish it.



I started getting fat when I was ten.
I started hating myself at twelve.
I started healing close to forty.
Do the math. That's a lot of hate.
 

Hi, sweet friend. I'm Hillary McFarland, author of The Secret Life of a Curvy Girl. 

From the time I was ten years old I have been heavy, weighted with flesh and emotions and responsibility. I have always worn big questions, big hips, big dreams, and big tears. And so, “She's kind of a big girl,” said hesitant folks, looking for ways to describe me. As I grew older and wider, their tones grew sympathetic. “But you have such a pretty face.”

“Thank you,” I always said back, buried my face in my journal and cried.

Body hatred was born before I entered my teens and implanted itself in my bones.

Many years later I've come to see that hatred of the body is not only a fleshly struggle, but a spiritual one. The truth is, our bodies are sacred. Whether you are extra-lush like me, or wish you were, I want you to understand why your body is sacred and how to start healing. Right now. As-is. Before you do anything to visibly change how you look.

The Secret Life of a Curvy Girl started out as a creative course for the woman who knows what it's like to hate her body with such a rage that she breaks out in hives and stabs her thighs with scissors.

I wrote it for the woman who learned a twisted message from the Bible that her body, her sweet, blessed body that the Lord made with love just for her, is wicked and sinful.

I wrote this for the woman who longs to make peace with the body she has right now—not the body she secretly pins on Pinterest or a body shaped by a tummy tuck, surgery or facelift.

The Secret Life of a Curvy Girl is love-positive book, which means it is body positive. It's not about obesity acceptance, nor does it promote an ideal of thinness. It is about self-acceptance, love, and truth. While I write from my experience as a lush woman, and use language that is specific to an abundance of curves, many principles I share are not limited to these.

Shame is not measured by your dress size, your sale, or your BMI. This book is written for women who are ready to heal a lifetime of body shame through truth.

You can’t shame yourself into love. 


Body hatred comes in all shapes and sizes.
It’s time to make peace.